Friday, December 11, 2009

From the "WTF?...OMG!...Really?" file (Episode Two)

Once again, immaturity rears its silly head and I need to take a break from all the lovely grown-up beauty products and talk about…weird, useless crap.

In Episode One, we visited one of my favorite websites (Stupid.com) and I showed you all kinds of fun beauty products like Cheetos Lip Balm and Toilet Bowl Lip Gloss. But surely you didn't think that was all there was, did you? Oh no! Of course there's more. As long as there are people sitting in cubicles across America with too way much free time; new and fabulously weird things will continue to be invented.

Of course, the pinnacle of weirdness and uselessness will always be Cocktail Weenies Bubble Gum.

But this is a beauty website. So today we'll be visiting the folks at perpetual kid for our very un-grownup beauty items.

CHILDISH LIP-SMACKING FUN

Corn Dog Lip Balm

Blurb: Our luscious Corndog Lip Balm will keep your lips plump and moist just like a hot dog inside that delicious fried corn bread batter! Great for friends who love frankfurters.

Absinthe Lip Balm

Blurb: Have your lips had a rough day? Let them unwind with a thin coat of our Absinthe Lip Balm. The delicious anise aroma will have them perked up and puckering in no time. Great for fans of green fairies!

Also on this site, Wasabe Lip Balm, Pillsbury Cinnamon Rolls Lip Balm,

BATHE IRRESPONSIBLY

Morning Sucks Soap

Blurb: Close those freakin' shades! I'm being blinded by the freakin' sun! And where the hell's my coffee? You call this coffee??? Our original Morning Sucks Soap is made with extra fancy, pure vegetable base Cyprus and orange peel. It's the ultimate little luxury gift for anyone who bathes, gets dirty or just wishes to smell fabulous.

Waffle and Syrup Soap

Blurb: Smells and looks so much like the real thing you'll just want to take a little bite! Breakfast is always the best way to start your day and what could be better than a yummy melt-in-your mouth waffle?

Hot Dog and Bun Soap

Blurb: So realistic looking you might think you could eat it! Nostalgic memories of baseball games and beach vendor hot dogs will leave your mouth watering and maybe make you break out the tongs and fire your grill up! Great gift for a baseball fan!

Okay, the hot dog soap comes pretty darn close to the bubble gum! While you're at it, check out Sushi Soap Set and Chocolate Chip Cookie Soap

EAU DE JEUVENILLE

Love Me - Necco Sweethearts Cologne

Blurb: The most delicate of the Necco Sweethearts, this is a transparent and light fruity floral containing orange, lemon, bergamot, peach, white rose, ylang, subtle skin musk and soft vanilla, to be shared, but only up close and personal.

Cannabis Flower Cologne Spray

Blurb: The Cannabis Flower which is at the heart of this fragrance is illegal to possess. This cologne captures the scent of shredded flowers from Cannabis Sativa, the hemp plant. Cannabis buds are reputed by herbalists to have healing properties. You decide. Slightly floral, slightly spicy, this fragrance has a deep and penetrating attraction.

Whiskey Tobacco Cologne Spray

Blurb: It's as simple as this. We think this blend of Whiskey and Tobacco Smoke is a great masculine scent. And sometime it's nice to be reminded of your Dad.

Maybe give these a spritz too: Call Me - Necco Sweetheart's Cologne, Sawdust Cologne Spray and Birthday Cake Cologne Spray

Need more? Check out more items at sites like Stupid.com, World Wonders, Archie McPhee and cyber candy.

Happy happy Friday!
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2 comments:

  1. I'm dying from laughing!!! The Cocktail Weenies Bubble Gum is my fave! LOL

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  2. You like them too! Now I don't feel so alone!

    Have to say, though, that the hot dog soap is a pretty serious contender.

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